When your college student comes home ...

I've heard many, many stories about the give and take required to live peacefully during winter and summer breaks with college students more accustomed to making their own decisions than following their parents' lead.

I get it. Fortunately for me, and in spite of my overachieving ways, my son is too innately kind and tolerant to remind me that he's already demonstrated the ability to take care of himself, thank you very much.

College Guy stumbled downstairs this morning to let the dog out and get some breakfast. I've been up for awhile and am in full "morning person" mode. He's bleary-eyed, appalled at rising before noon during a break from school, and absolutely not tuned in.

Me:  "Good morning! We're going to Stone Mountain today. Want to come? Did you bring your dirty clothes downstairs? Because I have a load going into the washing machine shortly and you can add yours if you want. Did that computer science class open up yet? I'm trying to decide about dinner tonight so let me know if you have a preference."

College Guy: "Wait ......................... What?"

Poor guy. Even as a toddler, he was slow to get going in the mornings. The difference was that I could just pick him up, toss him into the car seat, and head out while he stared vacantly out the window.

I have no idea how he gets himself up at school ... I'm just glad he does. He kept up with his medicine and his appointments, managed not to lose too much weight because he didn't want to bother going to the dining hall or grocery store, didn't lose his laptop or his cell phone, discovered that drying his beloved cargo pants takes twice as long as any other load, caught up after missing a week of school when he was hospitalized with an intestinal blockage, ate nothing but junk food and the occasional pear, went hiking at midnight with roommates "just because," celebrated his birthday with campus friends, saw first-hand what "stupid drunk" really means, and kept his grades up.

Yay for that critical first Freshman semester DONE.

For College Guy's birthday, I shipped a box full of party gear, including moustaches, a crown, pin the tail on the donkey game, party hats and blowers, glow in the dark necklaces, and candy. Goofy stuff. We had pizza delivered to his dorm, timed for the end of finals for the day. Evidently the moustaches were a particular hit with the girls, all of whom wore one for the duration.

Happy Birthday, my favorite son.

I play favorites with my kids, regularly telling each, "you're my favorite daughter" and "you're my favorite son." This always draws an eyeroll since we have just one daughter and one son. But that's the point. Each knows they're equally special, equally well loved, and equally unique.

Today is our son's 17th birthday. He's weathered quite a few storms for someone so young, but he's coming through with a quiet reserve and kind heart. He chose Luigi's for his birthday dinner tonight (they make a white cheese-and-garlic-sauce pizza off the menu for him) and a Carvel icecream cake to go with the candles. T is taking Marta to work so the teen can drive to school on his special day. So it's all good.

Happy Birthday. I'm so very blessed to be your mom.

Happy Birthday, AG

Monday, the tween turns 12, ushering in her last year of tweendom. Despite dire warnings and anecdotes by legions of friends and family and "experts" to the contrary, the tween years have been as endearing as the toddler and primary periods. Yes, there are emotional tides, but overall, these years are more about discovery and awakening independence as well as every-night cuddles before bedtime and enlightening conversations driving to and from school.

Thank goodness AG and her friends still consider birthday parties a totally cool thing to do. She scripted her 12th event carefully: dinner at El Azteca in Dunwoody Village, the walk to Bruster's afterward substituted for a drive to Carvel due to the rain, lots of screaming and dancing in the rec room, up past midnight, and homemade waffles and fresh fruit for breakfast. Guys were present for the front end; several of the girls stayed afterward for a sleepover. The cast included many new friends from PCMS as our girl expands her social horizons.

Wonderful kids. So thoughtful and well mannered with me and so completely unhinged with each other. I heard them dancing to Thriller and strumming with Guitar Hero; when I did one of my frequent walk-throughs, they barely noticed me as they continued board games and chatting ad infinitum. Yes, the rec room is completely wrecked. Yes, they're all hoarse from the screaming. Yes, we're all very, very, very sleepy this morning.

Well worth it.

Happy Birthday, AG

Today is AG's 11th birthday. She's chosen the Happy Sumo restaurant here in Dunwoody for her celebration dinner. The guys are sighing deeply (not a meat-and-potatoes kind of place), but going along with it because it's her special day. The big party was Friday night, during the crazy tornado time, and she already received her "big" gift from us. But there are cards to open from family and friends as well as big brother A's gift . . . and cake!

Today is also Palm Sunday. I'm always struck by the celebratory entrance Jesus made. Enthusiastic crowds waving palms, certain that he'd use his God-hood to strike down the oppressive regime and lead them to paradise on earth. But Jesus certainly had other plans. The following days proved that his ways were not their ways . . . that power comes in many forms. Sad thing is, we still don't understand him. We want God to strike down our oppressors - poverty, illness, evil, random tragedy. But His ways are not our ways.

So we enter Holy Week with hindsight. We know how everything ends. We also know the amazing triumph after the end. I keep that in mind as I think about the tragedies, small and large, in our own community . . that triumph can come even after an ending.

The birthday that slapped me upside the head

Today I hit one of those milestone birthdays. It comes with these:

He went to Jared! Check out the major WOW factor of my extravagant diamond necklace and earrings!!!

and these:

The kids got me knitting loot! Sock forms, a shawl pin, and a pattern that I really wanted. I promptly put Jaywalker #1 on one of the sock forms.

and these:
my cohorts at Dunwoody Nature Center shared the love - luscious lavender to grow in a pot and a custom designed bracelet featuring butterflies, the icon of one of our biggest special events!

I'm not going to say which birthday I'm celebrating. I quite enjoy the shock on the faces of the much-younger moms who find out. If I broadcast it here, the surprise isn't as much fun.

I feel blessed in so many ways. Except time! So much still to do. So much less time. Ah, well. I'm just going to have to kick it up a notch and get even busier exploring new byways and moving ahead. My kids came to my husband and me when we were older than our peers. Just as knitting came to me later in life than the knitters I admire.

I've always been a late bloomer.

I'm trying things right now while friends have already "been there done that." They shrug, think I'm kind of slow, and move on to the next big thing. I don't mind toddling along afterward. I'm too busy enjoying the here and now!

Check out my roses and lovely vase! T will be in San Francisco for Valentine's Day, so he presented me with flowers during the birthday festivities. The guy doesn't miss a thing.

So today, for my birthday, I count my blessings:

• My husband and children - I longed for this when I was younger and got everything I imagined.
• Knitting - of course! It's meditation, recreation, socialization and inspiration.
• Fulfilling work - writing, the Nature Center, website management, teaching Preschool Phonics.
• Community of faith - what would I do without you?
• Friends - you're wonderful!
• Home - it's OURS. How very essential that is.
  
• My inner Donna Reed. I admit it. I was born in the wrong generation.

It isn't all good. But it's good. Yes, indeed.