Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Not looking.

I just realized that I never look in a mirror anymore.

After a brisk 20 minute shower, hair drying, and minimal makeup, I'm ready for the day. And I never look back.

What freedom.

It isn't that I don't care what I look like. It's just that I know very well indeed that what looks back from the mirror doesn't match the way I feel on the inside. There are silver hairs and crow's feet, a slowly developing turkey neck and jowls . . . the signs of relentless, encroaching middle age.

In the plastic surgery, high impact workout world I live in, I should be appalled at this state of things. I'm well aware that I may be judged lacking in the looks department, and even pitied because I'm giving in to my age.  Instead, I feel free. My genetic code and super-busy life are irrefutable facts in life-as-I-know-it, so why fret? I find joy instead in my family, handcrafts, gardening, walking the trails at Dunwoody Nature Center, church fellowship, friends, scoring a bargain at a thrift store, cooking good food, and learning something new.

As long as I'm tidy and the clothes are somewhat coordinated, I'm fine.

I'm not looking. I'm enjoying.

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